Confused freshman on new environment


Dear Didi

Dear Jyothi:
I am a freshman in college.  I only applied to a few schools and got accepted.
I chose a school a few hundred miles away from home.  I got stuck in a sophomore dorm.  I am so miserable.  I hate the place.  My roommate is never around.  He goes home every weekend.  Week-nights are so lonely.  When I go to eat in the cafeteria, I have no one to eat with.  I bring my books and pretend to study. I feel pretty stupid. Everyone eats in groups.  They just look the other way, when I walk by their tables. I used to have so many friends in high school.  I can’t believe this happened to me. My advisor says that I am stuck here for the whole year.
— Lone Freshman

Dear Friend:
This is probably one of the most difficult times that you have faced.  I am sorry that your freshman year is so miserable for you. Now, your advisor has told you that you must stay in your dorm as is, because it is a sophomore dorm.  Yet, you are a freshman. There may be no other dorms open to you at this time.  However, that may not be true at this time.
Other freshmen may have quit. There may be other openings.  Now, you should contact your advisor’s supervisor.  If you feel reluctant to go over your advisor’s head, then try stopping by when you know your advisor won’t be there. You have the right to request another advisor or the assistance of the supervisor. One other option is to get permission to eat at the freshman dorms, so that you might be able to eat with some of your classmates If there is no solution being offered to you, then you have a right to withdraw.  Perhaps, it won’t come to this. Colleges are in the business of education.  They do not really want to lose students, especially in this economy. You must be assertive, but polite.  How are your grades?  Will you be able to transfer any of these classes?  Has this situation affected your studies?  The other option is to join as many clubs or study groups or any sports as possible in order to meet other students. Secondly, are you able to get carryout from your cafeteria, and sit elsewhere, outside if warm or in the lounge with a TV?  College is supposed to be a time of adjustment and having new experiences.  Yet, yours are not working for you. It is still early in the year to make these changes. Your other option is come back and go to a community college.  Do not give up your dream of getting a good education.  Remember, if you do come back to only to take courses at your local community college that will transfer.  It will not be easy for you.  It will not be easy for you to make these changes, but use this difficult experience to grow. Stay in touch.
— Jyothi

By Jyothi Rao

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